Thursday, March 18, 2010

Hello. Is there anybody in there? Just nod if you can hear me.

Is there anyone at home?

So I have a bit of difficulty having faith in things I can't see. I'm an empiricist at heart, really. It's always been the case. So this pregnancy has been very interesting for me. I can't see what's going on in there.

Right now I'm just on the cusp of 19 weeks, when many women are feeling their babies move. I've been feeling something, but is it the baby kicking? I don't know. No one can tell me. I read that it feels like this, or it feels like that, but also that every woman's experience is different. So that's not much help.

But, because I've been working on it, I do have faith that the kicks will come soon, if these aren't they. And I'm terribly excited every time I feel what I may ultimately discover was gas. I slow down and hold my belly. I even turn down the radio, which, surprisingly, helps. It doesn't matter if it's an elbow, or a knee, or a round ligament adjustment. All of those things bring me closer to the moment I meet my baby.

1 comment:

Jill said...

Check out the Bad Plus cover of that song. I *big puffy heart* love it.

As for the other, well, I'm still learning that motherhood is a journey of not knowing, having to just trust the little voice in your head and/or heart, and just plain waiting for possibilities to blossom.